Monday, 1 October 2012

The His and Hers Series - Part 3: The Birth


The season had gotten off with a bang.  The team had had a pretty short preseason but they had spent a lot of time in the research department.  Word had come through from the coach’s box that the team had gotten over the line and were looking forward to an exciting season.  We were now in the grand final.  We had burst through the banner of the labour ward, led by our wonderful midwives, and Ange was now very much in the game... and I was very much on the side wondering what could I do?  What do I say?  Where should I stand?

That didn’t last too long as I soon just got in there and played my supporting role.  Just said what came naturally, stood by Ange’s side, held her hand and provided a shoulder to lean on.  This all went well until the final quarter when things started getting really exciting.  The obstetrician had re-entered the fray, the nightie was off and it was game on. 

There was a lot of cheering “C’mon! You can do it! Well done! Keep going!”... and then a walnut appeared!  Honestly, my first thought when I saw ‘the walnut’ was “How is that going to smooth out?”  Judging by the roar that was coming from Ange I don’t think she was thinking the same thing.
Now from my vantage point I could see everything!  I’m not going to go into details but the correlation between the lightest touch of the obstetrician and Ange’s blood curdling yell was, for lack of a better word, interesting.

Well the siren was nearing, and Ange was preparing for her final push into the forward line.  The nurses and obstetrician were all there ready for the game to come their way and the cheer squad was doing his best to be there and supportive but also making sure that he wasn’t in the way. 

Mr.T came along and yes, he was the most beautiful bundle in the world.  He went straight to his mother for a cuddle and I cut him free.  He was also a jolly big beautiful bundle of joy, not as big as his old man, but 9 pound 4 is nothing to sneeze at.  Then came the placenta.  I don’t think Ange got the chance to see it but to even see the nurses being surprised at the size of this thing and saying “Is that 4 veins?” (rather than the usual 3) brought a smile to my face which said “That’s my boy”.


I have been dreading writing this part of the ‘his’ and ‘hers’ series for obvious reasons! But also, I think it’s just going to be full of pauses and ellipses’ (...) because it was SUCH a blur. It was a total of 3 and a half hours from the labour ward to the birth.

I had an enormous fear of giving birth. I was NOT the girl watching the video in Biology thinking this was a beautiful and natural experience. I was the girl exclaiming “Ewww! That is so gross! OMG!”  I was so self conscious. I couldn’t imagine getting that exposed. I knew it was going to hurt, but I told myself I would try to stay dignified, clothed and under control. Ha! Here is how it went:

I remember kneeling on the ground with the gym ball in front of me and sucking on the gas like my life depended on it...

I remember the obstetrician telling me to, ‘Get off that gas! You might have hours and hours to go’. Then she got me up on the bed and decided maybe that was an incorrect assumption as I was already 7cm dilated...

Then I just remember...pain...and learning when to push...

I remember my dignity going out the window...A nightie? No thanks, just get everything off!

I remember being asked, “Do you want a mirror?” Hell no! I was too scared it would be like when you’re a kid and you scrape your knee. It hurts. Then you look at it and all of a sudden it hurts triple the amount.

I remember the voices of support of my husband and my obstetrician. I remember myself asking for pain relief and being told I couldn’t have it because it was too late...

The burning - lots and lots of burning, and some kind of crazy dialogue in my head telling me to end this and end it now...

And then, the best part.  A baby in my arms. I was still dazed and the nurse said “Look! Look! It’s your baby!” I looked down and there he was. Every cliché was true. All of them including:
My heart melted
All the pain washed away
Nothing in the world could change that moment
He was perfect
All the natural instincts took over

I remember asking how big he was. My obstetrician looked at me and said “BIG” And big he was. Mr T. Entered the world at 8:58pm on November 4th, 2011 weighing a whopping 9 pound 4.

I can’t compare the labour as it was my first but I am glad it was fast. And I’m proud to say I did it drug-free apart from the gas. However, if I knew that he was going to be that big, I think I would of been asking for the drugs before I even walked through the doors of the hospital due to the sheer terror of the whole thing! He was, IS beautiful and I wouldn’t have him any other way and just to end with another one of those true clichés. All the pain was WORTH it. Every bit.

So...what did you think of this part? Any comments? Got any of your own crazy birth stats? Share them with us!

Linking up with Jess on IBOT!


  1. aww nice. i have a 8mth old baby girl. always looking for ideas so im following your blog! thanks fr visiting mine. mandy @

    1. Thanks Mandy! I'll be sure to follow yours too x

  2. love the his and hers version - very nice!


  3. I wish my hubby would write his version of our 3 births, but then again, not sure if I want to hear what he saw at the last one! 3 very different experiences, our 3rd born at home in a birth pool in the living room with husband at the business end for the final 2 hours. It doesn't seem to have scarred him but I still think he saw far more than I would be comfortable with! Oh, and born at home bub was almost 10 pounds (4.54kg).
    I love that you went drug free for your first birth, yay for you! Especially with a beautifully big boy. Well done x

    1. oh wow! 4.54kg! Women are amazing aren't they!? Kudos to the men too though. I actually think I preferred not being on the other end seeing it all! My husband was front and centre during my birth. I always said I didn't want him to, but in the end, whatever goes, goes doesn't it!

      Thanks for reading and commenting :-)

  4. Awww, well done on a great birth with such a beautiful little boy!

    1. Thank you! It was a great birth and we were very lucky. Thanks for popping by for a read.

  5. I love the His version, classic! I would love my hubs to write his version of Mia's birth but trying to get him to write anything bigger than a shopping list is not possible! Well don't on doing such a phenomenal job with such a big bubs! My Mia was born 19 days after your little munchkin and she was only 3.5kgs and that was an effort so excellent effort! And how shit is it when the OB takes the gas away! They did the same thing to me and like you there was no time for any other pain relief, it all happened too quick once we actually got to the hospital!

    1. haha, I think Steve did a great job. He is NOT a man of many words so it's fantastic to get a glimpse into his perspective of things.

      Oh the gas! I was so naive! I thought I could have the gas through the whole birth. Then I was told " can't suck and push at the same time..." Duh! I was gutted!

      Thanks for stopping by for a read! :-)

  6. Replies
    1. Thanks Yvette! We enjoyed writing it, this one was a challenge though!

  7. When you said you were terrified and grossed out by child birth I thought to myself "oh thank god, a perspective from someone who was in the same state of mind I am"... and I gotta say Bange... I'm not reassured! hahahaha I will remain terrified and grossed out.
    Love your blog even as a non mum, great job xx

    1. hahaha I don't think you can be reassured until you do it and it's all over. I thought it was so gross that I actually told Steve for a long time I didn't want him in the labour ward. I was terrified he would be put off for life lol. There was no way he would have any of that though. And well, I think he actually copped all the gross stuff. I just didn't look! :-)

  8. I had to convert the pounds to kilos. And by god woman 4.2kgs. You did well. I struggled with my 4 with 2 of them being c sections and they were all under 3kgs.

    1. I know right. I saw the premmie babies in the ward and I said "OMG! They would just like..slide out!" haha

  9. Well done! That is a big baby! Hard work to push any of them out, but especially one that size!

  10. Yep. Remember throwing the nightie off too. Just needed to focus on the job at hand, anything touching my skin didn't feel right. Great job sharing this very personal experience with us, honestly. Of course, I relate to your account the most, but I am sure my hubby would be totally on Steve's side.

  11. I had a 9 pound 4 baby too and they don't exactly shoot themselves out! And all along my doctor was convinced he was just average. I think the words "I told you so" were one of the first things I said following the birth.